Thank you for this – I still struggle with thinking the best about someone and wanting to love them vs remembering how I was treated and that it just wasn’t right. This helps to give me clarity – it was not love…it was selfish and abusive and wrong on so many levels. I get to still be kind and considerate but this person gets no more of my deep love. Self protection seems like a better way to go for me. There are still times I want to reach out tho – crazy yet true. Why? Because I believe that I can love someone enough to help them see. I know I can’t and this article helped me understand that even more.