I am open to better understanding how you think I am blaming others for being hurt?! I absolutely take responsibility for my part in hurting them and I have worked to make amends. Both people understand that my intentions were pure and that I didn’t even realize I had hurt them. I’m so glad we were able to work it out and that they know my heart is not to intentionally hurt people.
Of course we can hold people accountable for their actions and I agree that intentions can be vague. The reason I write that is to encourage people to look at the heart of a person and not just “how they treated me!!”. I encourage people to communicate instead of creating stories in their heads that may be incorrect. If we always assume people are out to hurt us it can be a really tough space to be in mentally. I like to believe the best in people unless I learn that they are incapable of empathy or of taking responsibility. In that case I would just move on to people who do have good intentions and good hearts.